quietmint

Voting For Anyone Else Would Be An "Obamanation"

2008-10-28T01:29:00.003-06:00

Outside of chronic degenerative diseases, the top cause of our demise has long been accidental death. This broad category of mortality – which includes much more than simply dying from falling into a ravine or meat grinder – is often taken for granted, yet it is one of our country's most important strengths. You may be tempted to accept that 4.8% of fatalities in the United States being attributed to unintentional causes is adequate. After all, accidents are already the fifth-largest cause of death, second only to heart disease, cancer, stroke, and respiratory disease. I, however, know that we can do better. Although we are off to a great start, much remains to be done if our nation is to remain a viable world superpower and truly progress in the future. Unless we commit right now and adopt the "I don't think, therefore I am not" attitude, our once-great nation will swiftly fail.

The leader of our nation has a direct impact on mortality rates. As the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) statistics clearly show, the accidental death rate drastically declined under the Clinton administration. Thankfully, the downward trend reversed in 2001 when President George W. Bush first took office, and, by the beginning of his second term, Bush had single-handedly raised the rate of unintended deaths back to the acceptable pre-Clinton levels America was accustomed to. Although the CDC has not yet released data for the most recent years, I am confident that the latest term of the Bush administration has brought us unprecedented levels of accident mortality we never thought possible. Continuing this work and ensuring America's place as one of the greatest nations in the world will require a continuation of our incredible leadership.

We must act with urgency to ensure our future. With the next Presidential election just days away, Americans need to step up to the challenge of putting someone in power who shares our like-minded vision of increasing the unintentional death rate exponentially. By electing John McCain, the candidate who announced to over 56.5 million television viewers that "we have to make health care avoidable", we can accomplish just this. Although his campaign will maintain that the elderly man simply misspoke during the final presidential debate, his "accidental" idea to abolish the medical system and get rid of health care altogether is perfectly in line with what today's voters want from the next leader of the country. Without the worry of hospitals, doctors, medical bills, or insurance companies, the public will be encouraged to live up to their full potential and try never-before-seen stunts. The Republican party's prescription of ex ante moral hazard, causing people to reduce or completely abandon self-protective activities, is a theory well established by the world's top economists and precisely what America needs. As an added benefit, the shock value that comes from hearing about a McCain-Palin win will be enough to at least triple the accidental death rate during the month of November and jump-start the new administration's progress.

With a completely new Commander-in-Chief, it will be our civil duty to bring the troops in the Middle East home safely as soon as possible. Our government is paying the country's bravest men and women to be shot, bombed, tortured, and otherwise killed by radical Islamic terrorists, yet their deaths are only counting as mere "acts of war", not as accidents. Many of the family members left behind, anxiously awaiting the return of their loved ones in body bags, seriously consider committing suicide. This, also, is deeply saddening because purposefully killing oneself does not increase America's number of accidental deaths in the slightest. Instead of sending our most daring and rambunctious citizens off to a foreign land, we should be spending that money subsidizing their continued presence here at home through copious donations of trampolines, Jet Skis, and once-in-a-lifetime skydiving lessons. Hiding in army bunkers and protecting exploding mosques cannot rival the resulting spikes in unintended fatalities from jumping into a power line, flying headlong into a riverbed, and falling from the sky due to failed parachutes.

While these proposed temporary measures are essential, sustainable growth in accidental death rates will require a fundamental economic policy shift. Our financial markets are in the midst of the worst credit crisis in recent history, scaring away many American investors. As these old rich white men have begun fleeing to Europe and Asia with their money, one can only imagine how low the number of fatal high-speed Lamborghini chases on US roadways must have already plummeted. The problem is only further exaggerated by the fact that men account for 69% of all unintentional deaths, and people aged 65 and older have an accident mortality rate almost four times higher than average. It is clear that electing John McCain president, with his lengthy experience as a senior, will be vital in enacting the social security and other economic reforms necessary to reverse this trend and bring the elderly Caucasians – and their capital – back to our financial markets.

The government must also examine the fiscal policies of foreign powers. Thankfully for America, vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin has been watching "as [Vladimir] Putin rears his head and comes into ... Alaska". By applying her extensive knowledge of foreign policy to the current financial crisis in the United States as well as duplicating the policies of neighboring Russia's economy, which has fallen over 60% since May and nearly halted as of late due to heavy reliance on foreigners for all long-term financing, Palin will also be a key player in permanently reshaping our economy.

Our task at hand is monumental. Increasing the rate at which people are unintentionally maimed each year will require us all to work together. As a resident of the great state of Utah, I am proud to be represented by someone who understands the importance of this campaign. While some would have been concerned to see their state senator set aside the needs and concerns of his constituents, I know that the weeks Orrin Hatch spent composing an original song in support of John McCain's election will be paying off for years to come. We must set aside our differences and – whether black or white, gay or straight, Republican or Democrat – vote for John McCain and Sarah Palin. As much of our country's history demonstrates, united, America can achieve anything – even reckless abandon – so "sure as heaven we're gonna win. Start celebrating, now let's begin!".

Your Family Share: $2.60

2008-10-14T02:21:00.000-06:00

In 2007, the US Mint produced 2,089,500,000 new dimes. Two trillion! Averaged evenly across the year, this equates to over 66 dimes per second.

A single dime is 0.705 inches in diameter. Lined end-to-end, the dimes produced last year alone would stretch over 23,249 miles. [For comparison, the circumference of the Earth is 24,800 miles].

A single dime weighs 2.268 grams, so there are 200 dimes in one pound. 2007's dime production weighs in at over 10.4 million pounds. [For comparison, my car weighs 2,800 pounds, and the world's heaviest record land mammal, an African elephant found in Angola, weighed 27,000 pounds].

Make Firefox Look Like Google Chrome

2008-10-11T13:42:00.004-06:00

As cool as Google Chrome is, many of us have been reluctant to switch due to the lack of AdBlock Plus. With a few quick tweaks, however, you can give Firefox some of the same look and feel:

Of course, you're not getting Chrome's performance improvements by doing this, but it's at least a start. Shown above is my Firefox 3 looking like the Chrome browser [running in Linux with the chrome-like GTK theme and the MurrinaChrome Emerald theme]. Here is what I did to achieve this:

Change the appearance.
- Install the Chromifox theme for th e overall look and feel
- Install the LocationBar² extension for address bar highlighting
Unify the address and search bars.
- Get rid of the search box. From the View menu, select Toolbars > Customize and drag the Search box off the toolbar so it disappears.
- Change the address bar search behavior to show results: In about:config, change the value of keyword.URL to http://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=navclient&q=
- To restore the functionality of your search plugins, create Smart Keywords for your favorite websites.
Speed up cross-site browsing by installing the DNS Prefetch extension.

How To Win At Credit Cards

2008-09-04T17:27:00.002-06:00

Credit cards are awesome. If you're not using a credit card for every purchase, you should be. Apart from the free benefits that pass many people by -- like automatically doubling your warranty up to an extra year on almost all purchases (including electronics) and refunds on prior purchases in the event of a price drop (remember the first iPhone?) -- credit cards allow you to earn cashback and other rewards. Of course you won't be able to quit your day job, but free money is free money. As long as you have some self control, you can make the system work for you instead of against you.

This post lays out how I run my credit cards. You should first familiarize yourself with the video clip Don't Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford. To make this work, you must never pay any fees and you must never pay any interest. With that in mind, let's get started.

Find a card with a rewards program that matches your spending habits
Finding the right card can be one of the most challenging parts of the whole process. Ask yourself basic questions about your spending to help you figure this out. Where is all your money going? What is it that you're buying all the time? Where are you shopping? If you don't use credit cards exclusively yet, you should first look for a good general-purpose cashback card (e.g., the highest reward amount you can find that is not dependent upon purchase amount, location, category, etc.). If you already have a general-purpose card like I do and are now looking to get some extra goodies, try to pinpoint an area of your spending for improvement (e.g., a certain category or certain store that gets a large share of your money) and find a card that gives higher rewards to this area.
- The best general-purpose card I've found was the Capital One No Hassle Cash Rewards card, but the version I have is no longer offered. It beat out the other cards because you could earn 1.25% on every purchase instead of just 1%, but Capital One is now charging an annual fee for cards with this option.
- The best gas card I've found is the Discover Open Road card. They offer 5% cashback on the first $100 of gas and automotive purchases each month. Since it's a Discover card, it's not specific to any particular gas station so you can use it anywhere. Another bonus is that you can use it at Sam's Club (which generally has the cheapest gas around) and still get the 5% discount. At $4/gallon, you save $0.20 on each gallon of gas purchased with the Discover Open Road card so you are effectively paying $3.80/gallon. Although you must redeed cashback in $20 increments, the rewards never expire as long as you use the card. Obviously, since you are only earning 5% on gas and since you stop earning 5% after the first $100 per month, you should only use this card to buy gas and only up to $100 per month! Any gas once you reach the $100 monthly limit as well as all non-gas purchases, should, of course, be purchased using your general-purpose cashback credit card (in either of these cases, the Discover card turns into a crappy tiered reward system starting at 0.25% -- yuck).
Double check for deal-breakers
- Anything with an annual fee is out, no questions asked. This generally means airline credit cards. You aren't going to spend enough each year to recover the cost of the annual fee. The idea here is to save money, not spend $59 a year on absolutely nothing.
- Stay away from tiered reward systems. This means you should avoid things like the Blue Cash card from American Express. You aren't a big spender, remember? If you need to spend $6,500 before you start earning decent rewards, you aren't winning.
- Avoid reward systems with expiration dates. You aren't going to be making money hand over fist (in fact, it's quite the opposite), so don't run the risk of losing your cashback because you didn't earn enough in X months.
Apply for the credit card online
I'm assuming you know how to use the Internet, so this should be self-explanitory. Since you probably aren't going to read all of the terms and conditions, make sure that you save a copy of everything you "agree" to during the application process.
Card activation and automatic payment request
When you receive your card in the mail, follow the activiation instructions (call the number on the front of the card from your home phone). You will be sent through an automated activation system, then transferred to a sales representative who will try to upsell you other products and services offered by the company. It is important that you refuse all of this value-added crap! Do not let them give you a free trial, you must outright refuse. Don't hang up, however, because you need to speak with someone about automatic payment. Most likely, the credit card company has an automatic monthly payment option that allows you to have your entire statement balance withdrawn from your bank account each month. Usually you must call customer service to have this activiated, which will result in a paper form being mailed to you. While you're on the phone with customer service, have them mail you this form (or have them transfer you to someone who can mail you the form) so you don't need to call again.
- Chase allows you to setup automatic payments online so you don't need to play snail mail tag.
Privacy policy opt-out
As soon as you've hung up with the activation line, you'll want to stop your credit card company from cashing out on your personal information. Look through the documents that accompany your credit card and find the privacy policy leaflet. Located in the middle of this leaflet will be a section titled "How Can You Limit Sharing of Information About You?" with a toll-free phone number or website. Call the phone number and opt out of both kinds of information sharing. You don't want your creidt card company sharing information with non-affiliated third parties or within their family of companies.
- Chase allows you to opt-out online.
Setup your online account
Of course you'll want to keep up with your credit card accounts online, so sign up for an online account. Enable paperless statements to stop your credit card company from mailing you a paper bill every month with your personal information written all over it.
Automatic Payment Setup
When you are signing up for automatic payments, make sure that you choose the option to have the entire statement balance automatically withdrawn from your bank account monthly. The key is that you must pay the entire balance every month! If you're paying any interest, you're not winning. Setting up automatic payments will ensure that you are never late on your payment, and that you never pay interest for carrying a balance.
- Mark the date that that automatic payment will be withdrawn on your calendar. Have your calendar notify you 3 - 4 days before the payment will be withdrawn so you can ensure sufficient funds are availble in your bank account.
Win
Use your credit cards for thier outlined rewards purposes. Never pay interst or fees and get cashback deposited to your bank account or applied as a statement credit. :)

quietmint's AdBlock Plus List

2008-08-21T18:57:00.005-06:00

I've launched an AdBlock Plus filtering list. If you're using AdBlock Plus, click below to add it and catch some text ads and other annoyances not found on the included EasyList.

Subscribe

Just Add Potato

2008-07-28T02:07:00.001-06:00

I was recently taken to a new low looking through this weekend's newspaper. I am now the shamed owner of a coupon for a product called Potato Finishers.

All-American Potato Finishers ("Great on baked and mashed potatoes!"). This is exactly what America needs. How have we been eating potatoes for all these years without this product? Basically, it is a bag containing cheese sauce, shredded cheese, and bacon bits. It's not like you could buy cheese sauce, shredded cheese, and bacon bits in already-prepared, individual packages and then apply all three items to a potato separately. Moreover, it's not like you could buy a chunk of cheese and shred it yourself, or buy packaged bacon and cook it yourself. The fact that the main ingredient is missing from the product should be your cue to run in the other direction. If that's not enough of a hint, seeing that the widely-publicized coupon allows the "savvy" shopper to "save" $1 on this item, the price should scare off the rest of you; I'd guess $3 - $4.

Perhaps even more disconcerting than the Potato Finishers themselves is the fact that a Google search for "potato finishers" returns eBay auctions for the very coupon to which I earlier referred as the first result. It's not enough that our planet is littered with this coupon in who knows how many newspapers across the country; people are now selling this same coupon for actual money. There are presently 8997 food coupons listed on eBay. You probably had no idea that there is such brisk trade in food coupons happening right under your nose. Is there really a market for mass quantites of useless food coupons? I am also unsettled by the fact that a single product line now merits its own domain registration (thank goodness sargentofinishers.com was available, imagine the horror if terrorists had snatched up the domain and our All-American Potato Finishers couldn't have their own website) and web design efforts. As the nutritional information and even the list of ingredients is conveniently absent from this special website (it's a food product, what else could the website legitimately have?), what does appear on the site is laughable. I'm not sure I'd agree that pictures of fake cheese mixtures on top of various degrees of fried potatoes qualifies as "exciting serving suggestions". Not to be outdone, the hidden nutrition facts are equally bothersome: 1/4 of the small pouch is considered a single serving and has 23% of your daily saturated fat intake and 25% of your daily sodium. Ah, America owes you a vote of thanks, Potato Finishers.

Who Need Socialized Medicine When We Have Socialized Oil?

2008-07-15T00:43:00.001-06:00

It has never occurred to me that I could call the government if I were to run out of gas.

Alan Peterson, Incident Management team leader for the Utah Department of Transportation, has been assisting drivers who have pushed their fuel tanks too far and run out of gasoline. In 2007 the team gave out about 721 gallons of gasoline to stranded people. This year so far, they have already given out about 524 gallons. [...] Last month, the team helped 150 motorists refuel.

If the end of the year sees double the current amount, that equates to 3 gallons of free gas every day. At the current price of $4.15/gallon, Utahns are [collectively] paying $12.45 every day because of a growing number of idiots (as of last month, we're now up to 5 per day!) who disregard their fuel gauges. Is it really that hard to put gas in a car? Even using the lower 2007 numbers, 721 gallons divided by 52 weeks is 14 gallons/week. Let's hear that again with gusto: The government is handing out a full tank of gas every week! My car doesn't even hold 14 gallons, but I'd still like to know how to submit my name into the drawing. ;-)

Get Real

2008-06-20T03:49:00.004-06:00

I feel compelled to write something about the passing of my friend David Heiner. I want to say how his passing pulled at my soul. I want to say how I lied in bed for two days straight, unable to even get up or understand the world anymore. I want to say how it has turned me into a better, more aware person. The fact is, however, that I was not close to David. I can count the number of times I saw him on one hand. I never had the chance -- rather, I never took the chance -- to truly meet and get to know him.

David Heiner is the third David to have altered the course of my life. How many more Davids will I have to endure to escape from my world of deception and lies? I want to scream and cry and stand aside all at once. I want to stab myself to attack the jealousy and laziness within me, yet protect myself from all harm to stand strong forever against the taboos of our social world that I want so badly to correct. I want to run headlong into the fog that is stubbornness and melt it away like the rising sun. I want to stop the flood of fleeting, contradictory emotions. I want to reach out and touch someone and have them hold me tightly against their chest and tell me everything will be alright. I want the insomniatic battle to end and I want to wake up to a new, victorious dawn. I want to tell the truth and I want to be accepted for it.

This time, a David has changed my life for the better. He is my catalyst. It is not because we were so close, but precisely because we were so distant. He has made me realize that there must be countless people that I have let slip through my life; friendships I let pass by. It also has made me aware of the friendships I currently have and how they may be slowly slipping away. I have a handful of great friends who truly care about me -- even though I have not always realized this or treated them with the same level of respect. I am a hypocrit for looking around at my friends and showing anger at how they never call me up or take an interest in my life, yet I, too, sit idly by without reaching out to any of them. I know it will be a gradual process, but I hope to now turn over a new leaf and start to become a better person.

Make VLC And ATI Graphics Cards Get Along In Ubuntu

2008-06-16T21:47:00.007-06:00

Update 8/26/08: I've improved the compizswitcher script so multiple wrapped applications can run at once (Compiz Fusion will only be reenabled once the all wrapped applications are terminated).

If you use Ubuntu on a computer with an ATI graphics card, you may be disappointed (to say the least) with the video quality. While the quality can be improved by visiting Settings > Preferences > Video > Output Modules and choosing the XVideo output module, this seems to simply switch one problem (blocky picture) for another (flickering).

The problem is that the ATI graphics driver for linux, fglrx, does not get along with Ububtu's 3D desktop effects manager, Compiz Fusion. Both programs fight for control over the display, resuling in flickering as one redraws overtop the other. The "solution" is to use to disable Compiz Fusion while playing videos. You can "wrap" the vlc executable around the following shell script which will automatically disable and re-enable Compiz Fusion as necessary. (The same script can also be wrapped around any other problematic application.)

Run the following code to prepare for the script (one-time only):

sudo apt-get install libnotify-bin compizconfig-settings-manager
sudo touch /usr/local/bin/compizswitcher
sudo chmod 777 /usr/local/bin/compizswitcher

Use your favorite text editor to save the following script as /usr/local/bin/compizswitcher:

#!/bin/bash -u
# quietmint.com Compiz Fusion wrapper script (8/26/08)

if [ $# -lt 1 ]; then
echo "Usage: \$0 <command>"
exit 1
fi
ICON="/usr/share/ccsm/icons/hicolor/scalable/apps/plugin-showdesktop.svg"
LOCKFILE="/tmp/compizswitcher.lock"

# Disable?
if [ ! -e \$LOCKFILE ]; then
echo "[compizswitcher] Disabling Compiz Fusion"
DISPLAY=\$DISPLAY metacity --replace 2>/dev/null | cat /dev/null &
notify-send --expire-time=3500 --icon=\$ICON "Application Compatibility" \
"Visual effects are temporarily disabled."
else
echo "[compizswitcher] Duplicate instance, Compiz Fusion was already disabled by another process"
fi

echo "$$" >> "\$LOCKFILE";
trap unlock INT TERM EXIT

# Run the original command
$@

unlock() {
# Enable?
OTHERS=$(grep -v "^$$$" "\$LOCKFILE")
if [ ! -z "\$OTHERS" ]; then
echo "\$OTHERS" > "\$LOCKFILE"
echo "[compizswitcher] Duplicate instance, leaving Compiz Fusion disabled for other processes"
else
rm -f \$LOCKFILE
echo "[compizswitcher] Enabling Compiz Fusion"
DISPLAY=\$DISPLAY compiz --replace >/dev/null 2>/dev/null &
sleep 2
notify-send --expire-time=3500 --icon=\$ICON "Application Compatibility" \
"Visual effects have been re-enabled."
fi
}

After saving the script, run the following commands to create a "wrapper" application for VLC (repeat for other applications, switching "vlc" with the appropriate application name):

sudo mv /usr/bin/vlc /usr/bin/vlc.real
sudo touch /usr/bin/vlc
sudo chmod 777 /usr/bin/vlc
echo 'compizswitcher vlc.real $@' > /usr/bin/vlc

Now you can enjoy high-quality, flicker-free videos without completely sacrificing the aesthetic 3D effects of Compiz Fusion.

Fully-Clothed People Take Out The Trash, Too... Don't They?

2008-06-16T21:42:00.001-06:00

While taking the garbage out, I happened to notice the slogan on my box of trash[y] bags: For the protection you need to get things done. I didn't expect something so dirty from a company bragging about keeping America clean.

I Would Like Some Justice NOW Please

2008-05-29T00:13:00.007-06:00

Why do people ask pointless questions? Asking for permission to borrow things is usually pointless; I would call it laughable if this annoyance weren't so frequent. Since most requests are non-destructive, it doesn't really make sense to tell someone no when they ask to use something like scissors or a blender. As long as the person borrowing the item returns it in the same condition, why not? This makes asking pointless. The whole idea is undermined, however, by the people who don't ask and don't return. These are the people on my hit list because not only do they take your things, they also force us otherwise normal people to ask for unneeded permission. In other words, the kind of people who would steal your blender out from under you aren't going to ask permission in the first place, so you won't have the chance to tell them no, while the people that are thoughtful enough to ask are also going to be thoughtful enough to hand you back a clean blender when they're finished, so there's no reason to deny them from doing so, yet it is still socially necessary to ask so that you are not assumed to be in the despicable first group. So long as I live I shall fight this injustice; I do not ask for pointless permission, but of course I return borrowed items in their original condition.

Everybody Wins

2008-05-11T23:26:00.005-06:00

Although it may be a noble goal in their minds, I'm not sure why it is necessary for a city to spend so much of their time continually eliminating parking spaces. Aren't there ~~bigger~~ actual problems to deal with?

While the theory that fewer parking spaces make people more inclined to walk or use other forms of transportation may sound good, eradicating parking does not actually accomplish this. There are still just as many or more cars today than there were yesterday, so there is just as much or need for parking. If people have been ingenious enough to create parking spaces from the unused space in the planter strip -- keeping their cars off the road and leaving more land available for other purposes -- it follows that the city should be singing their praises. It doesn't follow that "if everybody pays, everybody wins". Maybe it's just me, but I think I have a different definition of "winning".

Frozen Bananas

2008-04-10T21:34:00.004-06:00

There are a few products in the marketplace that invoke a bizarre, nauseating reflex upon contact with our brains. These products, such as frozen bananas, are incredibly puzzling as the more they are contemplated, the more it becomes clear that their existence must solely be to invoke this bizarre, nauseating reaction. Why else could frozen bananas exist? Who could possibly be benefiting from crystallized precut chunks of curved yellow fruit? Worse still, who are the people being suckered into buying these bags of prepeeled, presliced, flash-frozen bananas? With fresh bananas readily available in all parts of the country and selling at retail for less than $0.39/lb., an amazing amount of labor in peeling bananas would be required before prepared frozen bananas would even remotely make economic sense. Has our society really deteriorated so much that we no longer have the time or patience to "pull tab here" on fresh bananas?

Utah For The Win!

2008-03-26T16:21:00.001-06:00

The Defense Department mistakenly shipped secret nuclear missile fuses to Taiwan more than 18 months ago and did not learn that the items were missing until late last week [...]

Officials with the Defense Logistics Agency (DLA) sent four nose-cone fuse assemblies to Taiwan in August 2006 instead of four replacement battery packs for use in Taiwan's fleet of UH-1 Huey helicopters. [...] It was unclear yesterday how the two very different items were mixed up at a warehouse at Hill Air Force Base in Utah.

Utah for the win! Seriously, how do you mix up batteries and nuclear weapon parts? One has dimensions comparable to a breadbox and the other is the size of my under-counter refrigerator. Come on, people!

The FBI Is Now Your Fairy Godmother

2008-03-24T00:29:00.002-06:00

Hey keys, now having your home raided by the FBI and getting arrested is just a click away! Add illegal hyperlinks to the exponentially-increasing multitude of dangers to avoid in our modern world:

The FBI has recently adopted a novel investigative technique: posting hyperlinks that purport to be illegal videos of minors having sex, and then raiding the homes of anyone willing to click on them. [...]

Federal agents knocked on the door around 7 a.m., falsely claiming they wanted to talk to Vosburgh about his car. Once he opened the door, they threw him to the ground outside his house and handcuffed him.

It's been quite a frightening week, but this is still the scariest thing I've read in a while. It's more upsetting than knowing thieves can hack RFID credit cards for $8. It's more distressing than Verizon giving the government direct access to all customer's mobile voice calls, text messages, and physical location data. It's even worse than Comcast being able to watch you through cameras they're putting into their cable boxes. Why? Precedent is so important, and given that the government doesn't even understand what the Internet is, they are in absolutely no position to be criminalizing it. I'm not defending child pornography, but the Internet browsing I do in my own home is absolutely none of the FBI's business. Clicking on a hyperlink should never be considered a crime, and it should never cause authority figures to show up at your door, grab you, throw you in a van, and haul you off to jail... or worse. What's to stop them from extending the illegal hyperlinks baiting beyond porn?

I'm so glad that the government will be able to pair this technique with the Patriot Act to keep America safe from all those ~~ordinary people~~ terrorists searching the Internets for "weapons" and "drugs" (nevermind they were actually looking for "history of Japanese weapons" and "cancer drugs and treatment options"). Of course, the private sector and their lobbying showboat wouldn't miss the party, either; nothing would please the RIAA or MPAA more than having armed officers dispatched to your door for attempting to download music or movies online. Ah, freedom! Don't you feel better already? :-p

Add "Play DVD With VLC" To Folder Right-Click Menu

2008-03-17T15:10:00.015-06:00

Are you, too, annoyed by how difficult it is to just play DVD video files from your hard drive? Simplify your life by adding "Play DVD with VLC" to the right-click menu of every folder in one easy step! Press Windows Key + R to bring up the Run dialog and enter the following command:

REG ADD "HKCR\Folder\shell\Play DVD with VLC\command" /ve /d "\"%ProgramFiles%\VideoLAN\VLC\\vlc.exe\" -f \"dvd://%1\""

That's it! The effects are instant; try right-clicking on a folder now. :-)

If you decide this tweak isn't for you, run this command to undo the change:

REG DELETE "HKCR\Folder\shell\Play DVD with VLC" /f

Fat America, Meet Web 2.0

2008-03-16T01:43:00.007-06:00

What is the world coming to? Does anyone else find the idea of a calorie-counting Firefox extension as hypocritical as it is undeniably disturbing?

Google Maps Bookmarklet

2008-03-15T01:34:00.000-06:00

Make getting directions easier with a Google Maps bookmarklet; just drag this link to the Bookmarks toolbar in your web browser. Now you can highlight an address on any webpage and click your shiny new Map It button to instantly see the place on a map! :-)

Map It

Netflix Account Hold Is A Scam

2008-03-05T20:58:00.007-07:00

Although I'm definitely a fan of the online DVD rental service Netflix, they have again disappointed me today. The website offers the option to put your memership "on hold", which will temporarily stop Netflix from billing and mailing movies to you. On the surface, it looks like Netflix really cares about its customers by offering this extra convenience. From my point of view, however, this is really a selfish policy whose only purpose is to boost the company's bottom line.

Let's say you are a Netflix member whose billing date is at the beginning of the month. You are about to go on a two-week vacation, so you place your account on hold today and set the service to resume in two week. You've already paid for movies for the two weeks of your vacation, but, by placing your account hold, have elected to stop their delivery. In order to actually give you what you've already paid for, Netflix should move your billing date two weeks ahead to make up for the time that you will not be receiving movies. Netflix doesn't do this. Unless your billing date is during your vacation, you gain nothing. The worst part is that you actually increase your risk of financial liabilities for the zero benefit you receive: Your account will be charged $20 per disc for any movies that aren't received by Netflix within seven days of placing your account on hold. So basically, if you try to be an organized person and place you account on hold but then forget to mail those three discs back before you go on vacation, you've just given Netflix $60 for absolutely nothing.

I telephoned Netflix customer service to verify I correctly understood the account hold policy, which I did. Confronted with this information, the representative couldn't tell me why I would want to place my account on hold.

Label All Forwarded Messages In Gmail

2008-03-05T01:49:00.007-07:00

If you're like me, you've gotten tired of checking each of your multiple email accounts and have finally decided to have all of your mail forwarded to your main Gmail account. You login to the extraneous accounts and set them to forward to you@gmail.com. You login to Gmail and setup filters based on the To: header so your forwarded mail is automatically colored orange. It sounds like a great plan -- and it is -- until you discover that only some of the forwarded messages are getting labeled. Huh? As it turns out, those mailing list messages are addressed To: mailing.list@school.edu and those viral marketers can't be bothered with the To: header at all, so your filters aren't very effective.

Fear not, however, because there is a simple solution to this problem! This trick works because of plus addressing, a feature in Gmail that allows you to create an unlimited number of email addresses by adding a plus symbol (+) after your username. In other words, all mail sent to you+anything@gmail.com will arrive in your inbox. You can take advantage of this when aggregating your email accounts by having your secondary accounts forward to a unique plus address. For example, set your school email to forward to you+school@gmail.com and set your spam account to forward to you+junk@gmail.com.

Now for the real key: Gmail has a secret "deliveredto:" search operator that will catch all mail arriving at the given email address -- whether or not you were listed in the To: header. In other words, this will even apply to messages from mailing lists and bcc emails. To automatically label you forwarded junk mail, for example, create a new filter and type deliveredto:you+junk@gmail.com in the Has the words textbox. Congratulations, now all of your forwarded email will be automatically labeled! [Update 3/28/08 (thanks Phil): The deliveredto: operator expects you to enter the entire email address, but if you want to filter on just a portion of the email address, you can place it inside of double quotes (for example, deliveredto:"+junk").]

[Update 3/5/08: Wow, what timing! An Official Gmail Blog post about plus address appeared about six hours after this was published. Although plus addressing is nothing new, this is the first time Google has publicly acknowledged its existence on their blog. They didn't mention the real secret to making plus addressing work, though, which is the "deliveredto:" operator.]

Make Wall Posters On The Cheap

2008-03-05T00:44:00.004-07:00

As most college students have learned, posters are an easy, non-destructive, and effective way to decorate. In short, they are awesome. Wouldn't it be great if you could get that same poster for almost free, and with the exact picture you wanted? If you have access to a printer, you can! Websites like Block Posters allow you to upload a photo and have it split into printable pages that can be put together to make a wall poster of any size. The following describes how to do the same task the real way -- using Adobe Photoshop -- allowing you to make wall posters with much more control and of higher quality.

Creating Single Image Posters

The first step in making a poster is always selecting the paper. Although plain paper will work, photo paper is relatively inexpensive and gives a much nicer finished product. Sam's Club sells a 200-sheet box of double-sided matte photo paper for just $20 ($0.10/sheet). Even if you purchase online, deals like this Merax Glossy Photo Paper aren't hard to find and are still affordable ($5.98 with free shipping for 20 sheets, $0.30/sheet). The real reason for starting with the paper selection, however, relates to math. As true borderless printing is not a reality, we must account for margins when splitting our image across multiple pages. Take your paper size and subtract a 0.25" margin from all sides to get the size of the printable area. For example, I'm using photo paper that is standard 8.5" x 11" letter size, so the printable area of each sheet is 8" x 10.5".

Next, decide on the size for your finished wall poster. Here I'm going to make a 9-page landscape poster (3 x 3), so the total printable area of the poster will be 31.5" x 24" (10.5" x 3 for the width, 8" x 3 for the height).

It is finally time to load up an image in Photoshop. I'll be using this photo I took of the Arc d'Triomphe; feel free to follow along. Select Image > Image Size and resize the image to the total printable area you just calculated. You'll want to keep the aspect ratio constant to avoid distorting the image, so it may be necessary to resize the image to something larger than the total printable area (for example, my photo was resized to 32" x 24", because the other alternative of 31.5" x 23.625" was smaller than the printable area). Before clicking OK on the resize dialog, adjust the Resolution to 150 pixles/inch if it is not already at or above this number.

If your image is not the exact same size as your total printable area, which is usually the case, crop your image. Grab the Rectangular Marquee Tool (M) and change the Style dropdown to Fixed Size. Type in the total printable area in the width and height fields. Click anywhere on the image to position the marquee around the portion you wish to keep. Select Image > Crop to perform the cropping.

Now it is time to divide the photo into individual pages. Grab the Slice Select Tool (K). Click anywhere on your image to select slice 1 (the default slice), then click on the Divide button. In the Divide Slice wizard, you'll want to divide your image both vertically and horizontally, one slice per page. For my 3 x 3 sheet poster, I divided my photo into 3 slices down and 3 slices across for a total of 9 slices.

The last step is to save each slice to an individual file. Select File > Save for Web. You will get a warning telling you that the image is very large, just choose Yes to continue anyway. When the Save for Web wizard appears and begins to generate the optimized image, press the Esc key on your keyboard to stop the process (remember the warning?). Now press Ctrl + A to select all of the slices. From the dropdown on the right side of the wizard, select PNG-24. Now simply click on the Save button. Type a name for your poster, select Image Only (*.png) from the Save As Type dropdown, and click Save again. Each slice (each page) has now been saved in its own PNG image file. These files can be printed exactly as-is and arranged to create a wall poster. :-)

Creating Multiple Image Montage Posters

The real reason to use Photoshop instead of a one-click website is because it allows you to combine multiple images into a single montage wall poster using the Contact Sheet feature. Because the end result is much cooler, this requires much more math. :-p You'll need to put all of the pictures to be used in the montage into a new folder. [Note: Don't use pictures with different aspect ratios. You'll need to make a new folder for each aspect ratio and repeat this entire Contact Sheet process for each folder.]

For simplicity, I'll be making a 2 x 1 poster (total printable area: 21" x 8") using a few of my favorite Boy On A Stick And Slither comics. Feel free to follow along by downloading this ZIP file containing 12 comics. The comics are square, and if I place 6 comics across, the dimensions of each will be 3.5" x 3.5" (21" / 6 = 3.5"). With 2 rows of 6 comics, the height will be 7". We'll call this 21" x 7" measurement the total montage area.

Armed with your calculations, launch Photoshop and select File > Automate > Contact Sheet II. Change the Use dropdown to Folder and then click the Browse button to navigate to the folder containing your images. For the document size, enter the size you calculated for the total montage area (here that is 21" x 7") and a resolution of 150 pixels/inch. Also from the calculations, enter the correct number of rows and columns in terms of images -- 6 x 2 in this example. Uncheck Use Auto Spacing and set both the Vertical and Horizontal spacing to 0. Also uncheck Use Filename As Caption and you are finally ready to click OK. A contact sheet will be created; examine it carefully to ensure that the images tile seamlessly with no white space.

Before going any further, you'll need to select Image > Canvas Size and resize the document to the total printable area (21" x 8"). After entering the number in the Canvas Size wizard, place the Anchor in the top-left corner and press OK. At this point, follow the instructions as above for creating a single image poster, diving the document into 2 vertical slices.

Make Free MP3 Ringtones For Your Cellphone

2008-03-04T14:09:00.007-07:00

Making your own ringtones not only saves you money, but also gives you a small sense of pride, accomplishment, and self-worth.

The easiest way to get ringtones onto your computer is using Bluetooth. Your phone and computer both need to have Bluetooth capabilities for this to work. If your phone doesn't have Bluetooth, you are pretty much out of luck. Make it a point to demand Bluetooth on your next cellphone. [While you may be able to transfer ringtones using a data cable specific to your phone or via WAP/the mobile web with an unlimited data plan, neither of those topics are covered here.]

Don't worry, however, if your computer does not have Bluetooth (most don't). You'll just need something like this Bluetooth USB dongle (only $8.50 with free shipping :)). Besides the low price, this specific adapter looks like a good choice because it is compatible with the native Bluetooth stack in Windows. This means that you won't need to worry about any drivers -- just plug the device into any XP or Vista computer and it will magically just work (like a USB flash drive does).

One-Time Bluetooth Setup

The first time you connect your computer and your phone via Bluetooth, it is necessary to go through a pairing process. Right click on the Bluetooth icon in the system tray, next to the time and choose Add a Bluetooth Device.

The Bluetooth wizard appears. Now it is necessary to make your cellphone discoverable so it can be found by the computer. Navigate your phone's menus to enable Bluetooth and make your device visible (this is sometimes called "Find Me"). Once your phone is discoverable, check the box labeled My device is set up and ready to be found in the Bluetooth wizard on the computer and click Next. Your computer will now begin searching for Bluetooth devices, and your mobile phone should appear in the list shortly. Select the device and click Next. If your device does not appear, refer to your phone's user manual for instructions on ensuring Bluetooth is enabled and that the phone is discoverable.

On the next screen, leave the default Choose a passkey for me option selected. Windows will begin the pairing process and will display a passkey of random numbers on the screen. Your phone should prompt you about connecting with your PC and ask for the passkey. Type the numbers on your phone as they appear on your screen. Windows will then perform some additional set up and your phone will be ready to use! Once your phone has been paired with your computer, you won't need to repeat these steps again.

Creating Ringtones

To trim songs into 30-second clips, download Audacity. It's free and also lets you apply cool effects like adjusting speed, pitch, and volume. Using Audacity is left as an exercise for the reader. Play around with the options and trimming until you get the part of the song you wish to use as a ringtone, then simply choose File > Export. This will allow you to save your clip as an MP3 file.

Transferring Files Via Bluetooth

Once you have your desired ringtone as an MP3 file, open My Computer. Depending on your make and model of cellphone, you may be able to directly send this MP3 file to your cellphone (this works for most Motorola phones, such as the ubiquitous Razr). For my Samsung m510, I found that the file must first be renamed to have a .3g2 extension. Search the Internet for tips about your specific phone model. To transfer the file to your phone, simply drag and drop.

Confucius Says: Vote Republican

2008-02-26T19:54:00.004-07:00

Last night at dinner, I reached for a fortune cookie (like I frequently do) and found a most disturbing surprise within:

SAFE COMMUNITIES
Utah Republicans: Leadership that Delivers (... in bed)

What is this, communist China? I don't think it's appropriate to find this message inside of a fortune cookie anywhere, let alone one on campus. We can't even enjoy our food in peace anymore. Politics have gone so far as to invade even our desserts! Is there nowhere safe from their unrelenting, tireless grip?

The Cellphone, Not Outer Space, Is The Final Frontier

2008-02-20T22:58:00.005-07:00

Hey everyone, things in the cellphone industry are finally moving in the right direction for consumers... unless you're in Finland. The Finnish Road Administration is testing a system that requires sending a text message to unlock roadside bathrooms in an effort to curb vandalism at the rest areas. We all know that poor people without a cellphone don't ever need to pee, and that people who do have a cellphone can just hold it in if the battery is dead, so this should work out great!

Anyway... In November, T-Mobile and Sprint announced plans to join Verizon and AT&T in prorating early termination fees. Not wanting to be the last one again, Sprint became the first of the big four to offer an unlimited access plan for $119. Like sheep, the other carriers followed suit, and today all-you-can-eat mobile in the $100 range is a given. It is rumored that Sprint will be reducing the price on it's unlimited plan in response. America is ready; bring on the price war! :-)

Meanwhile, the FCC's 700MHz wireless spectrum auction is silently chugging away, determining whether or not a new nationwide mobile carrier will come into being in the airwaves previously occupied by analog television broadcasts. At the very least, however, the new nationwide block of licenses carries some of Google's suggested stipulations requiring the network be open. Locked handsets and forced use of vendor-branded applications may soon be a thing of the past as well.

All this hot mobile action has even caught NASA's attention. The space agency has decided to join the cellphone party and announced they are building a mobile phone network on the moon. That's right, on the moon. But don't worry, England is helping us to create this system, which their director of space science describes as being comparable to the "satellite phone network of the 1980s and 1990s on earth". That's quality tax dollars at work, right there. Seriously, what's going on? Were you all too busy preparing for tonight's lunar eclipse when you made that decision? Almost as hilarious is the fact that one of the goals of the network is to ensure a full four-bar signal for lunar colonists living in the base NASA wants to build at the south pole of the moon after 2020. It all makes so much sense now. No wonders humans aren't living on the moon -- it's because there has been no cell phone service! Build a cellphone tower and we'll be living on Mars before you know it. I wonder how much we'd have to bribe Finland to get them to launch one of their SMS-operated toilets into orbit. Oh, the possibilities!

"You Owe Us A Life!"

2008-02-19T23:44:00.008-07:00

While the title of this post is in reference to the excellent Chinese film To Live, it is really more applicable to the entire "movie" that is called Mulholland Drive. This monstrosity was the absolute worst "movie" I've ever seen, bar none (and yes, it even beat out Cast Away). There was absolutely no plot; a completely random scene will suddenly be inserted for the sole purpose of introducing a new character, but then we will never see or hear from the character again. The entire "film" was just the director's personal acid trip and made absolutely no sense. Although David Lynch was the director, we cannot forget the countless others who signed off on this project and allowed this "film" to be made. Mulholland Drive, you owe me two and a half hours of my life back!

In the much kinder words of the Washington Post, "Mulholland Drive is an extended mood opera, if you want to put an arty label on incoherence." The [continued] existence of this film is evidence that there can be no God, for no all-powerful being would allow anyone to be subjected to such an atrocity.